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External exploration, or searching outside yourself, is another way to nurture
the self.
Learn
Learn all that you can. Take in information from everyone and everything.
How do you learn best? People learn in many ways—they read, watch
movies, TV, or videos, do research in the library or online, attend lectures
and presentations, listen to the radio or audiotapes, or play challenging games
that encourage thinking and feeling. Many observe and use their other senses
to absorb information. Fred Ramirez Briggs, foundation director, has this
advice: “Learn as much as possible. Knowledge is power.”
The next step is to process information in some way by organizing,
sorting, categorizing, studying, analyzing, questioning, and talking to others.
Then decide to store, use, ignore, further process, or discard it.
As soon as you think you are mastering a subject, go a little deeper. You
will discover how much more there is to learn. The learning journey is infinite.
Take entrepreneur Margaret Hansson’s advice to heart, “Do not stop
learning.”
Change Your Environment
A different environment may expose you to new ways of living, thinking,
behaving, feeling, working, entertaining, having fun, and more. It provides
a great opportunity to question how you have always done things. Brooks
Preston, philanthropic consultant, commented, “I took six months to travel
and talk to people. My idea matured.”
Travel and vary your surroundings. I can attest from personal experience
that travel works. Change your job, discover a new set of people, culture,
procedures, and language. Experiment—go from rural to urban, civilized
to uncivilized, cold to hot, wild to domesticated, land to sea, sea to air,
stable to unstable, rich to poor. Shake things up a bit to stimulate your
growth with new experiences.
Talk to People
Get people, of all ages and perspectives, involved in your exploration. Follow
the advice of Linda Shoemaker, attorney and community builder: “Talk
to everyone. Hire the best people.” Let people show you and teach you.
Then listen. Find a mentor, coach, or role model. Strategically make proper
connections. Marsha Semmel, museum director, suggests,
“Work with someone to find more about yourself and your strengths and
how to align them.”
There was a time in growing up that I thought it was best to do things
alone. After all, you could have more control and ensure that things were done
your way. Then, thank goodness, I learned another easier and more enjoyable
way. Explore and learn with others. We have much to teach each other.
Take Care of Yourself
Now that you are building and nurturing your self, what is next? How are
you going to maintain that strength? It takes continual care. Just as muscles
grow weaker if you do not use them, your strength will diminish without
attention. Here are a few ideas that people have found helpful.
Pamper Yourself
Ellie Sciarra, tap dancer, tells us, “Go to the bathtub and places that nurture
the soul. Go to the beach. Do things that support you and your vision.”
What nourishment are you providing yourself ? After we started Radish,
I lost track of caring for myself. My energy was directed toward caring for
the company. Then the day before the big trade show preannouncing our
product to the media, I looked in the mirror. I took a double take. Was that
really me? If I didn’t take care of replenishing myself, I wouldn’t have any
energy left to care for the company.
The Universe provided—luckily my hairdresser quickly squeezed me in
and transformed me. When I came back to the off ice, our new president
noticed. “Wow, you look different,” he said. What he really meant was,
“What an improvement!” I felt revived, ready to pull off the greatest show
on earth, and recommitted to taking care of myself.
After making sure everything was ready, Dick and I flew out a day
ahead of the opening. Arriving at the hotel that night, I attended to the
next most important piece of my care plan—sleep. After sleeping 15 hours,
I was a recharged woman, more like my true self, and ready to make the
show successful.
Put some self-care into your plan. Whatever the elements, don’t let
them fall off the to-do list.
Take a Break
Respite can be a one-minute power break, a long workout, or a two-week
vacation. If you are like me and get totally absorbed, you lose track of time
as you enjoy the pleasure of progress. I set alarms in other rooms. Getting
up to shut them off mobilizes me. Another tactic is to drink lots of water
and let nature call you to move. Breaks make way for new inputs to keep
you going longer. Discover tactics that are most effective in forcing you to
take a break
Hang Out
As Anne Quindlan27 notes, doing nothing is important. Try a different kind
of break. One of my most precious photos was taken when my daughter
was just two. Snuggled in our backyard hammock, we looked at some of
her favorite books. Swinging gently in the summer breeze, we watched the
puffy clouds float by, the golden aspen leaves shimmer, and hummingbirds
dart to the feeder. Here our head, heart, and hands touched as we read stories,
shared some of our own, and giggled.
I don’t remember what project I was working on in that period of time
or what business phone calls I missed to hang out with my daughter Annie.
While it is diff icult to do nothing at work, take a few minutes to just
sit and gaze out a window. Look at clouds or snow or rain while letting
your mind drift. When was the last time you just hung out? Is your soul
calling? Where is your beloved place to hang out, for a moment or a month,
without a care in the world? Give yourself, and others, permission for a refreshing
reverie. |
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